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           Let’s go around the BACK DOOR!


I had a conversation with one of my friends today who has been celibate for the duration of her 10 year marriage which has now ended and she has landed back in the dating scene.  We were swapping stories (even though I don’t date!) and the subject of sex came up and how times have changed.  She asked me ‘What’s up with the Ass’ to which I burst out laughing.  It has indeed come to my attention both personally and professionally that what was considered ‘exotic’ fare has become more the standard and guys go for the ass without even an invitation.  The pussy doesn’t seem to please (or at least be enough anymore)…

Thankfully during my last relationship I was ‘broken into the idea of the ass’ and it became a pleasurable occasional experience (albeit rare given that he was on the LARGE side) however one of my recent lovers expected it on the menu at every sitting and we had a conversation about how this for me is not like Bangers & Mash but more like a Gateaux – not something I want every day but happy to indulge in on special occasions.  I get the appeal – its dirty, raw and naughty….still a little taboo and elicits primal noises from the very base of our nature however I want men to realise that while yes we may enjoy this activity we are built differently.  Our G-Spot is in our Pussy not our Ass (which yours is (Prostate) and why anal stimulation for you can actually be more pleasurable and illicit more intense orgasms) so don’t forget about our magic sexual organ that is ripe to be explored, navigated, worship and mastered for those wanting the challenge.

Rather than wanting more toys, think about the toys you have and learn how to play with them well – guaranteed if you learn the skills, magical secret doorways and worlds will blossom open in ways you never thought possible and I don’t mean just emotionally or mentally!

I find this current ‘Age of the Ass’ apt for where we are as a general society…We live in the shadows, denying truth, seeking more without valuing what we have and then being content to not raise real issues into the light of discussion – our desires have become shameful, unrealistic and often singular – not mutual in gratification.

This was reinforced after I was thinking about the recent Pope scandal and how such an epic event has been so superbly managed into obscurity to protect our ignorance. My base instinct is that the last Pope was a ‘Fucking Ass’ – and with still no reason, discussion or comment about why this happened and the silence of the current pope, it smacks of giving people time to forget to question or ask the deeper questions of the church, faith and what serves us – it seem hard to change.

The Church and The Ass seem to have the same marketing guys whom I would love to speak with! Let’s bring real conversations about our lives, bodies and faith into the fore where nothing is ‘off limits’ but that everything can be discussed with transparent mutual respect – even those shadows of the past which may be shocking…allowing them to be transformed by Love.

And guys….before you head round to the back door – ASSK!    Nicolette Bell

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